By Ifeizu Joe
An Anambra based journalist, Mr David-Chyddy Eleke has taken to his Facebook handle to shower praises on his girlfriend, after what he described as 10 years of beautiful relationship.
The journalist who is married described the girlfriend as his side-chick, saying that in all the 10 years that they have dated, the girlfriend has remained faithful to him.
Read the full piece below…
Ode to My Side-chick of 10 Years
By David-Chyddy Eleke
If you have had a beautiful relationship with someone for 10 years, there is need for you to celebrate it. It doesn’t matter whether the relationship is husband and wife, boyfriend and girlfriend, boss and employee relationship. If the person you have had the relationship with has been true and faithful enough to your satisfaction, you should celebrate them.
So, today, I celebrate my side-chick. We have been in this relationship for 10 years now, and she has not defaulted even once. The little faults I have noticed are just same that anyone else notice in their relationships.
Please don’t remind me that I’m married and still doing side-chick. Don’t also threaten to tell my wife that I’m into side-chickism. Side-chickism is a recent phenomenon, but my relationship with this chick surpasses the usual married man, side-chick relationship.
First, I’m aware of my status as a married man, and I walked into the realm of having a side-chick with my eyes opened. Again, don’t threaten to report me to my wife because early in my marriage, I told her of the need for me to have a side-chick, and she agreed.
I told my wife I loved her, and there was need for me to have an alternative. I told her if she alone were to service me, the burden may be too much on her, and wear her down.
She acceded to my request on certain conditions. My wife admonished me; “I will support you to get one, but please whoever she is, make sure I see her and approve of the relationship.” She also said: “Please don’t go for all those high-class babes, I don’t want a relationship you will enter with someone and you will forget me and the boys.”
We did just that, and 10 years after, I’m here to eulogize my side-chick for her faithfulness.
Since after she accepted to go into a relationship with me 10 years ago, we have become an item. We go everywhere together. Where have we not visited? She comes to work with me all the time, to the point that she is not new to my colleagues.
Each time I go with her to any of my numerous assignments within Anambra State, I leave her in the lobby of the hotel or event centre to go in for a press conference or press briefing or mere meetings. She faithfully sits there and waits for me to be done. Most times, my colleagues who are late to events see her and node to themselves, ‘Eleke is here already’.
Do I have fear about anyone poaching her from me? No.
I won’t tell you her name because she is shy and requested that I hide her identity. She also told me not to post her picture for now, so you won’t see it. When I’m able to thoroughly convince her, and get her approval, I will surely post her picture.
Let me tell you the things that are unique about this side-chick of mine. Beautiful, smallish, ever smiling and willing to oblige every request.
Her skin may be rough, but that doesn’t make her less taken care of. Some friends have advised me to tush her up “and bring her to your class”, but I have stubbornly refused to. It is not for nothing that I leave her in the lobby of every hotel, in many cities, and no man has considered wooing her off me. She is not attractive to other men because she does not wear those very flashy dresses, high heels, make up and fake accent.
With my side-chick, what you see is what you get.
My children know her too. They dislike her, they think I’m associating with a girl that is less my class. My first son, Ikenna came to me once, while I was about going out with her: “Daddy, she does not fit you anylonger. Each time I see two of you, I feel you need someone better.”
Don’t mind the little boy. What does he know? He doesn’t know if I were to get one of those high-class babes, I may stop sleeping at home, and before long, I may start using the money for their education to fund eyelashes, wigs and bags for a total stranger.
My children are not alone in this resentment. A colleague once told me that the way I have clung to her all these years without failing, they suspect that the talisman that guides my life is attached to her.
Let me confess, my side-chick does not harbour the talisman that keeps me. Let me even confess that as much as I love her, I would like to build a relationship with one of those beautiful, high-flying chicks, who wear nose rings, leg chains, short but expensive gowns that reveal a lot.
I would love one of those elegant chicks, who wear those expensive Brazilian hairs, carry designer handbags, and ooze fresh scent, from Italian deodorants.
I see them on the road everyday, I crave for them, even while I’m on an outing with my lowly side-chick. I have been tempted many times over to woo them, but wooing them is different from being able to keep up with their daily needs.
I wish, just a wish, that one good spirited individual would undertake the expenses for me to have one of those high-flying chicks, I won’t mind accepting them.
Not as if I will discard my side-chick of 10years, but we can just add them all together in the relationship. I’m sure my side-chick of 10 years will not mind. If my wife could endure her for 10 years, why can’t she endure a fellow side-chick who is coming to enjoy what she has been enjoying?
By the way, before curiosity kills my readers, may I state that, that sidechick of mine, is my thoroughly beat up assemblage of plastic and metal, a 1995 Volkswagen car, which I pound around town everyday. You can now re-read this piece with a clean mind, so that it will make the required meaning.
There’s nothing idleness cannot cause. I wrote this for fun. Goodnight folks.
